I know many people who are trying to gain more self confidence. They are serious about improving themselves and really put in the effort to do it. They will read various books, learn different techniques etc. But looking at their approach to gaining self confidence, I can’t help but have the feeling that they may never achieve what they want.
As long as they still have the misconception about gaining self confidence, they will not succeed. Many seeking to develop self confidence do it hoping that some day they will reach that place of supreme confidence. They expect that one day they will finally ‘get’ it.
They see confidence like it is a magical object to be obtained. And once they get it, they will be instantly transformed into a different person. A person more capable and courageous. They think that by reading books on confidence, learning techniques, practicing etc, they are bringing themselves closer to the magical object.
Sadly, many people do not realize that the kind of supreme level of confidence they are seeking for DOES NOT EXIST! That’s why no matter what they do, how hard they try etc it’s never gonna happen.
Most people think that the great successful individuals in the world are just naturally supremely confident. People like Tony Robbins, Donald Trump, Tom Cruise etc. Many think if only they have the confidence of these individuals, then they can be just as successful. They think that successful people are naturally confident and 100% sure of themselves.
Nothing could be further from the truth. Regardless of how successful someone is, or how confident they seem to be, no one is without doubts. Everyone has moments where they feel unsure, weak and not confident. So now the question is, if all those successful people have doubts and insecurities like the rest of us, how are they able to be so successful and seem full of confidence?
Well, they may not have that supreme confidence that many assume they have, but they do have one thing that sets them apart from everyone else.
What sets them apart is that they know there is no such thing as having 100% confidence. And because they know this, they do not wait until they are confident enough before taking action. Unlike many others, they do not prepare until they are fully ready, until they have no doubts.
Instead, they take action in spite of the uncertainties. They will do as much preparation as they can, and then they go for it. They never seek to be 100% certain first. If they did, they would probably end up never attempting anything at all.
When we know this, the barrier to gaining self confidence will be broken. By realizing that even the most successful people have uncertainties, fears and insecurities, we know that they are just like everyone else. Just like us. That means we have as much potential to achieve the success that they achieved.
Nobody can be free of uncertainties. We can never be 100% confident in any situation. Instead we need to take action despite the uncertainties. It is through experience that true confidence is developed.
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